


until

by littlesnowpea



Category: Beauty and the Beast (2017)
Genre: Character Study, M/M, this is not so secretly about my own emotions too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-11
Updated: 2017-04-11
Packaged: 2018-10-17 19:33:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10600755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlesnowpea/pseuds/littlesnowpea
Summary: LeFou isn't his real name.





	

**Author's Note:**

> so i, like lefou, am also in love with someone who has no interest in me and is also terrible. i identify strongly with lefou. thus, this was born. this is not a happy ficlet. unbeta'd.

LeFou isn’t his real name, of course it’s not his real name, what kind of mother would name their son _the fool_ , no matter how often he sometimes felt it?

He felt it a lot lately, felt it curling in his heart and pressing on his broken chest, whispering _fool fool fool_ over and over the more he watched Gaston watch Belle. 

Of course Gaston would not choose him, nobody would choose him, not out of a sea of others, not another man, of course not. But LeFou was a fool, a fool for hoping that despite this, despite Gaston’s affinity for war widows and other fine things, that perhaps one day it would be them, just them, together. 

Until Belle. 

The moment Gaston said “my future wife”, LeFou’s soul crumbled, burying with it his anguish and his real name, left for dead among the ruins. It didn’t matter any more, his real name hardly mattered, he was who he was and who he was was a fool. 

“My future wife” and LeFou should hate Belle except for how he can’t because she’s lovely and Gaston is handsome and the two loveliest and handsome people in the village should of course be together, of course. It only made sense, it made sense until Belle said “never” and the beast LeFou had been afraid of since the war was unleashed, the beast that said mine mine mine and took, took, took. It came.

It made LeFou lie to Maurice, though his conscience begged him not to, it made LeFou follow Gaston blindly to the castle, it left LeFou for dead under that harpsichord, reaching and gasping out Gaston’s name like a prayer that would never be answered. 

LeFou has the crack in his heart labeled _Gaston_ memorized, has ran his fingers over it so many times he knows exactly where his skin catches on the rough surface, knows precisely where it’s deep and cavernous and where it’s shallow and easily hidden. He had it perfectly committed to memory, but when Gaston walked away, leaving him behind, it was like an earthquake, an avalanche, a hurricane as it split open, leaving his heart raw and open to the elements, leaving his soul, or what was left of it, exposed.

The teapot said _you’re too good for him_ and somehow LeFou understood, has always understood, could see it more clearly than ever. He did deserve better than this, he did deserve better than this, Gaston was wrong, Gaston would always be wrong. 

So he switched, he helped the people the town had forgotten about, he forgot for one blinding moment the ache in his heart until Belle arrived and he shouted that Gaston was upstairs and _hurry_.

LeFou didn’t know if he felt pain or pity or relief when Belle told him later that Gaston had fallen to his death. It seemed a fitting ending for the monster that had been unleashed, but it was hard to breathe around knowing he’d never see Gaston again. 

The crack in his heart labeled _Gaston_ was there, it would always be there, but perhaps it would stop growing.


End file.
